Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Thanksgiving





Yes, Rosalie looks like a boy here. And yes, I guess yellow is not as gender-neutral as I thought before I had a girl, but nevertheless, this picture makes me incredibly thankful.

Almost exactly a year ago, Nathan and I were in Rome, and I was just 6 weeks pregnant. Rosalie was probably only the size of a tiny bean, but I was so excited to be pregnant, and I couldn't wait to meet our little one.

We wanted to get our baby something from our trip because we wanted to make sure that we remembered that he/she was there in her own tiny way, too. So we picked this yellow t-shirt from Rome, because we thought it would work no matter what gender our baby was (But I think the day I took this picture will be the first and last time Rosalie ever wears this little top! :)).

On the way home from Europe, about a week and a half after we bought that little shirt, I had some serious bleeding and was convinced that I had lost the baby. We were traveling and had no way of getting an ultrasound or going to the doctor, and when we arrived home in the states, it was a Saturday evening. All of the OB and family medicine offices were closed, and I was devastated.

I did not handle the situation very well at all. I was afraid, I was angry, and I didn't understand why God wanted to take away the little baby I was carrying -- who at 7.5 weeks gestation, was starting to grow her little fingers and toes. I couldn't figure out how losing her would strengthen me, and I refused to see how it could be what God wanted. Prayer was hard for me that weekend. Addressing a God I could not forgive felt impossible. I was ashamed at my attitude but struggled to change it. Saturday and Sunday were spent in tears and frustration, and on Monday afternoon, we were finally able to get an ultrasound appointment at an OB.

When the tech pulled up the ultrasound picture and showed me the little heartbeat fluttering on the screen, she broke into a smile, and I could hardly believe it. I had doubted and questioned God's goodness when I had no right to. And He was faithful despite my faithlessness. I certainly didn't deserve to be spared of that trial, but God was abundantly merciful despite my attitude.

I wish I could say that was the last time I doubted God's ability to take care of Rosalie and me during my pregnancy. I struggled throughout the entire 9 months with fear and doubt and the inability to take control of my situation. I hated that I couldn't see what was going on inside of me, that I couldn't make sure that nothing was going wrong. I had to totally and completely trust God.

Sitting here today, looking at the little bundle of giggles and smiles that God gave us in little Rosie, I can't help but overflow with thankfulness at His provision, His kindness to us, and His grace when I certainly didn't deserve it. The trials of pregnancy and fear of miscarriage helped remind me that God's ways are greater than my ways, that He doesn't work the way I expect Him to, and that even when I didn't trust Him, He delivered me.









Friday, August 2, 2013

A Move or Two...

The Last Year -- A Story in Pictures

Our second year of marriage was crazy, but wonderful! Very shortly after my last post, Nathan and I moved across town to an adorable little house near U of O. It was built in the 1940s, and we loved everything about it. Well, everything except the scarcity of outlets. Extension cords were our very close friends last year...


       About a month and a half after move-in, we found out that we were expecting our first baby!

 I still remember the thrill I felt after seeing that positive pregnancy test. We were so excited, nervous, happy, scared, thankful -- you name it! And we had no idea what to expect in the future months. The timing was crazy. The day after I found out I was pregnant, Nathan and I left for a three week trip that we had been planning for months.

We started our adventure in Avila Beach, CA with the Snider family. And just a few days in, morning sickness started to hit. I wasn't expecting it so early, but at 5 weeks I was done, and it just continued to worsen until a few weeks into my second trimester. Fighting nausea and exhaustion, we left CA after a few fun-filled days with the Snider clan, and boarded a plan to Scotland.



We spent a few days there with Brad and Rachel, touring the city and hanging out before we took off to Italy, our main destination.

Nathan and I had a fantastic trip, exploring Rome, Florence, Venice, Pisa, and the Cinque Terre. My only regret is that my morning sickness kept me far far away from the amazing Italian food. I could only stomach McDonald's french fries and basic breads. I couldn't even stand to smell the restaurants as we walked the streets. More than once, Nathan bought food from a small food stand and sat several feet away from me until he was finished with it. I hope to go back with Nathan some day and take advantage of the gourmet food and delicious wine, but first trimester just wasn't the time.

Trevi Fountain

The Colosseum

A few weeks after we returned to the states, my parents and Emily came to visit us in Eugene! It was Autumn by then, so we enjoyed apple picking, exploring the town, walking to Starbucks, and baking pumpkin bread together. It was a blast.



 Then... 3 months into my pregnancy... a baby bump!! Aah! Little munchkin was beginning to make her appearance and I was thrilled to have something to show for all the nausea :)


In early November, Nathan and I flew to Moscow to attend the funeral of a dear friend and to meet my newest niece, Lila Grace Eifert. We were very thankful to be able to make the trip.



And then in late November, we were given the exciting news -- we were having a LITTLE GIRL!! And so began the many shopping sprees, name debates, and decorating projects to prepare for our littlest addition.


When we were there in August, Brad and Rachel asked us to be godparents for their little girl, Pippa. So we flew back to Scotland right before Christmas to witness her baptism and enjoy to holiday season with them.

 It was a blast! Edinburgh is amazingly festive at Christmas! There was even a full-blown holiday fair and market going on right in the middle of the city. We loved it :) 

Then we flew back to the states to spend Christmas with my family.



 In February, Nathan and I went back to South Carolina to attend my grandmother's funeral. It was hard, but it was also a wonderful celebration of her life, and we were thankful to be able to see family and friends  again.

Then, in March, Luke and Emily got married! They were so happy, Emily looked gorgeous, it was such a beautiful wedding, and I just loved that we could be there and be a part of it! I love family :)




Only a month till baby, and I was going crazy!! We decorated the nursery, and got everything set up...


My stomach got insanely big, and I could barely walk...


Emily came to visit a week before my due date to keep me sane. I was so incredibly thankful for her company. It distracted me from the imminent, and we had a wonderful time hanging out together -- Starbucks dates, chick flicks, craft nights, walks to the library.


And then... two days later, on April 22, 2013, after 16 hours of labor that I would prefer to forget for the rest of my life, we welcomed Rosalie June Margaret into the world. 7 lbs, 15 oz and 20.5 inches, she was perfect. I cannot get over how much love I have for our little girl.






We welcomed my family as they came and visited, enjoyed wonderful meals made by friends, spent lots of time over at Nathan's parents (Nona and Grandpa), and meanwhile, our littlest munchkin just got bigger and cuter!



 We went through a few sad, hard days when our little Rosie was hospitalized for a fever at 5 1/2 weeks. But she ended up making it through the ordeal safe and sound! We just had a very trauma sensitive girl on our hands for a few weeks. I am so thankful that memory is behind us.

 A couple days later, my friend Lizzy came to visit! We showed her all around Portland and Eugene, and she just doted on our little Rosie!



And apparently we hate to have quiet time, so we picked up and flew to Los Angeles for a fun-packed few days visiting Nathan's aunt and uncle and bumming out on the beach.

 Even Rosie couldn't get enough of the Cali sunshine!


Then we rushed home and packed like madmen with the help of family and friends. 3 days after we got back from Cali, we loaded up the u-Haul -- so full that we ended up leaving some things behind! And off we headed on a new adventure. 


And now, here we are! Settling into our new home in Moscow, Idaho.




 So far, we love it! But we miss Eugene and the Sniders like crazy! It's been a bittersweet adjustment, but we are thankful for the opportunity we have to come back to Moscow for a few years -- to enjoy being near my family and a strong church community as Nathan finishes up his last couple of years in school.


Rosalie is growing up fast, and we don't want to blink for fear of missing it! She is all smiles and loves life, and we couldn't be more thankful for our happy little girl. 3.5 months old!